{"id":640,"date":"2012-04-29T03:48:11","date_gmt":"2012-04-29T03:48:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.craftingranny.com\/?page_id=640"},"modified":"2014-05-05T03:51:33","modified_gmt":"2014-05-05T03:51:33","slug":"seniors-alphabet","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"http:\/\/www.craftingranny.com\/?page_id=640","title":{"rendered":"Seniors Alphabet"},"content":{"rendered":"

\n\n\n\n
\n

Our new alphabet<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n

A for arthritis,<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nB for bad back,<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nC is for chest pains. Perhaps cardiac?<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n

<\/strong><\/strong>D is for dental decay and decline,<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nE is for eyesight–can’t read that top line.<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n

<\/strong><\/strong>F is for fissures and fluid retention<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nG is for gas (which I’d rather not mention)<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nH high blood pressure [I’d rather have low)<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nI for incisions with scars you can show.<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n

<\/strong><\/strong>J is for joints, that now fail to flex<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n

<\/strong><\/strong>L for libido–what happened to sex?<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nWait! I forgot about K!<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nK is for my knees that crack when they’re bent<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\n(Please forgive me, my Memory ain’t worth a cent)<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n

<\/strong><\/strong>N for neurosis, pinched nerves and stiff neck<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nO is for osteo-and all bones that crack<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nP for prescriptions, I have quite a few<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nGive me another pill; I’ll be good as new!<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n

<\/strong><\/strong>Q is for queasiness. Fatal or flu?<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nR is for reflux–one meal turns into two<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n

<\/strong><\/strong>S is for sleepless nights, counting my fears<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nT for tinnitus–I hear bells in my ears<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nU is for urinary: difficulties with flow<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nV is for vertigo, that’s “dizzy”, you know.<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nW is worry, now<\/span> what’s going ’round?<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nX is for X ray–and what might be found.<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n

<\/strong><\/strong>Y for another year I’ve left behind<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nZ is for zest that I still have my mind,<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nHave survived all the symptoms my body’s deployed,<\/span><\/strong><\/strong>
\nAnd kept twenty-six doctors gainfully employed!!!<\/span><\/strong><\/strong><\/h2>\n

I wish You a day of Peace, Happiness and Joy!<\/span><\/strong><\/strong><\/h2>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Your browser does not support the audio tag. Our new alphabet A for arthritis, B for bad back, C is for chest pains. Perhaps cardiac? D is for dental decay and decline, E is for eyesight–can’t read that top line. F is for fissures and fluid retention G is for gas (which I’d rather not […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"parent":244,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","template":"","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-640","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/P2leRo-ak","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.craftingranny.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/640","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.craftingranny.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.craftingranny.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.craftingranny.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.craftingranny.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=640"}],"version-history":[{"count":9,"href":"http:\/\/www.craftingranny.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/640\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2170,"href":"http:\/\/www.craftingranny.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/640\/revisions\/2170"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.craftingranny.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/244"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.craftingranny.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=640"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}